the windy city

by samaetha

the last few weeks have been dreary. ‘creative’ flow has been at a negative. any attempt to draw or even think has been futile. working full time in an almost mind numbing job has taken its toll and daily accomplishments have been reduced to waking up, going to work, finishing work and sleeping. anything after that is miraculous. but if i can say i’ve learnt anything from this dead space existence it’s that creating doesn’t just happen. you really have to work for it. you have to be so goddamn deliberate it hurts. sometimes you’ll feel as though the drawings or writings or makings are fake, forced and pretentious (they probably are..) but at least you’re doing something. get out the crap to pull in the gold. a lot of the time, if you’re seriously honest with yourself, what you’ll be drawing has been drawn a thousand times before. its nothing unique, its nothing new. you’re unreceptive,  ‘inspiration’ is dead, but when you’re stuck, who cares if its the best that you can do. just draw. at least you’re doing something. be diligent (dear god that’s a word you probably don’t want to hear..) and it will eventually come. if you’re going to live this life as a creative as you say you want to, then you’re going to have to get your head out of the clouds and admit that yes, yes you are going to make some shit art along the way. deal with it.